2024 Year in Review

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Happy Holidays! It's funny writing this after having de-emphasized my presence here over the past year as I had intended. The thing is, having a blog is nice to vomit one's thoughts under the pretense that you are writing for an audience, even if you're not writing for an audience at all. Why not start a diary? Because diaries are lonely. Where's the Other?

Hobbies

I've committed myself to three projects, in addition to whatever time I spend reading books or baking or whatever else. My brain seems to work in bursts, so having these activities helps me easily find something to do after burning myself out on what I had been doing.

  • The Brimstone Gospel: Biblical epic about women whose passion and loathing drives them toward apocalypse and self-annihilation, guided by desires and destinies beyond their own reckoning. Inspired by Ovid's Metamorphoses, it attempts to retell, reframe, and reinterpret the Christian canon by casting politics through erotics and vice versa. Characters include: Josie, a psychologist who offers herself to be sacrificed by an evangelical cult to attain godhood; Lilith, the first wife of Adam who is seemingly cursed by God to reincarnate; and Petra, an art historian whose lack of self-image subjects her to manipulation by those she trusts. Made it to ~30k words this month!
  • Cinco, Table-Talk Odyssey: Vulgar distillation of D&D 5e based on my own preferences, centering PCs and social interactions between players. Ran a few sessions using this ruleset for my home campaign Turtle Island and I like it! Been working on a magazine-size pamphlet, and commissioned the fabulous Norn Noszka to illustrate it.
  • Resourciv: 2D Civ-like game, where historical development is not for its own sake but is "motivated by instabilities internal of and intrinsic to civilization". Mostly did the base of the game, but I already implemented some structural quirks of interest: an experience system for "discovering" technologies; a random-interval system for player turns; and buildings being constructed on hexes. My next design goal is to figure out how to interface between resources and different modes of social organization, which I hope to be structurally rather than quantitatively distinct.

Although none of these are finished—far from it—I am happy with how much I've accomplished between each of them.

2024 Resolutions

I've never actually done new year resolutions before, per se, but this past year I determined specific aspirations for myself.

  • Treat every interaction like a realness contest. I realized I can present myself in any way I want towards others. It's less "fake it till you make it", more wanting to actively be the person I want to be.
  • Take no shit. Dramatic! But real. I don't need to tolerate people being jerks or pests. Goodbye! This served me well in the past year, and now I feel like the people I keep up with are those that do care about me.
  • Host friends at home more often. I've always dreamed of hosting people for some reason. So, I did exactly that—random get-togethers, D&D sessions, birthday parties. It's been nice! Lots of baking, less cooking but that too.
  • Reevaluate hobbies. Duh. Have you seen this blog in the past year?

I think these were all good, but I can go further.

2025 Resolutions 

Here's what I mean:

  • Be more annoying. This is an extension of treating every interaction like a realness contest, which I succeeded at except for times I didn't want to come across like annoying or a freak. But, actually, fuck that. I should be more vocal about things I care about, especially when it makes myself vulnerable or means reprimanding others. This is both being more annoying and being more of a bitch. I used to be more of a bitch. What happened?
  • Make sex jokes without wanting to kill myself. Too specific? I've had issues of personal comfort in the past with unwanted sexual advances and so on, but (and this is stupid) I realize that I exclude myself from a lot of fun bits for not wanting to participate, and not for a lack of friends throwing the proverbial ball at me. I'm witty and often gag-worthy with things I say. Why not let myself be the canvas of my own bits?
  • Go someplace. I want to go out of town. It's kind of difficult to do with my cat, since I'm always hesitant to ask anything of anyone, but I want to take the leap because there's places and people I want to visit.

None of this is that serious, but looking forward to this year! Hope y'all have had a nice holiday time :)

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